Reflections on RFKC 2010

So, this was my third year of doing RFKC. As you would expect, every year is different and this was no exception. My first year was pretty straightforward and overall great experience. It was great just playing and loving kids and they were the usual problems of trying to herd elementary age boys in one direction.

Last year was alot bigger of a challenge. There were kids that had more recently gone through alot and thus were reacting(strongly!) out of dealing with all the pain. For the most part, our room was not that hard. However, having campers on edge all around you raises the stress level of the whole camp. It is definitely one of those experiences that draws you closer to everyone else you are working with in a very unique way.

So, I went into camp this year sort of braced for the worst. Also, with having had some of the kids before(including one that I had the toughest time with last year), I was fully expecting this year to be tough. We start camp and realize that it will definitely be different.

Our room was definitely a difficult one(probably the most difficult one). As Jarred mentioned below, we definitely had 3 very alpha male boys that started hitting heads from the very start. However, the rest of camp was fairly at peace. Plus, with having alot more extra staff this year it made it alot less stressful.

However, as the week went on it felt like I had emotionally checked out. As far as I can tell there are 4 potential reasons that may have contributed to this.

1. With camp being more peaceful, I didn't have to be completely in the moment in order to survive.


2. I'd braced myself for the worse which meant that partly for my protection I was holding back from engaging with the kids.


3. I knew the pain that was coming on Friday when you remove yourself from your awesome community of co-laborers and from doing something meaningful for a week into the hum-drumness of life.


4. My relationship with God wasn't where it should have been, and I didn't make the effort to make it right before camp started.

So, it pretty much was that way all through camp until we get to Thursday night. Thursday night is when we had one of our kids totally explode. So, one of the after effects of that explosion, is one of our other kids just crying and chanting over and over "It's all my fault". Now this kid is one of the sweetest kids you'll have ever met. When we were playing Disc golf he volunteered to go last on every hole while the other kids were fighting about who would go first. He was always looking out for the other kids and even us counselors and continued to show love towards everyone. So, it just totally tore down the walls that I had built up seeing this kid beating himself up for something that wasn't his fault at all. I probably talked with him for 30 minutes trying to get him calmed down and to reassure him that it wasn't his fault and that he had been a joy to have in my cabin all week. That he was one of the most kind-hearted giving kids I've ever known. It is amazing the lies that we can believe about our self that are not true. After finally being able to talk with him about the good fun stuff we had been doing all week he finally was able to calm down and go to sleep.

That next day was a bit stressful having to deal with the results of the previous night. However, it pretty much went as well as can be expected. So, we get to our final event to get on the bus, "Have You Ever" and I get another opportunity to get my walls torn down.

My personality is such that I'm a bit more reserved. That plays out in alot of different ways. However at camp working with kids it can make it a bit more difficult. I don't have one of those personalities where kids are naturally drawn towards me. Also, I tend to be the one trying to keep kids behaving and on task so I'm the one yelling out, "5 minutes until we have to leave". So, that means that the kids usually gravitate towards my co-counselor this year Jarred(same as last year). I think it actually works out quite well for the kids since Jarred and I compliment each other pretty well and I feel like we work well together. However, it can be a bit hard emotionally. Esp. when you have kids insulting. Even though you are told to not take such things personally since the kids are just reacting out of their pain or from being told what to do it still is no fun.

So, back to "Have You Ever". So, after a point in the game where all the kids have left behind all the counselors Bas has the kids run back to their counselors. Jarred and I were separated a bit at this time so 3 of the kids go and run to Jarred. The other kid(the one that had been thinking it was all his fault) ran over to me. He then asked me why didn't anyone else run over to me and then made some sort of affirming statement about how he was glad that I was his counselor. And it just broke me with thankfulness that at least one of the kids appreciated me.

I love doing camp every year. In fact, I'm planning on doing it every year as long as TNL has camp for 3 reasons:

1. It is a great opportunity to show God's love to the least of these.


2. It is a great opportunity to build community with a group of people that you can rely on and trust and have a common vision.


3. It is a great opportunity for God to show you more of Himself and more of yourself.

Matt